Choup and the City

Okay... I like these commercials

2006-08-22T05:19:46Z

Haha... more good times

More apologizing...

2006-08-22T05:13:13Z

and this...

don't forget this!

Been foeva yo!

2006-08-22T05:08:58Z

But I'm keeping shit real!

Here's what I'm doing to apolagize

Beth Amphetamine (Pretty, Pretty)

2006-07-07T03:39:48Z

The new Single from Butch Walker's new album

The record "Butch Walker and the Lets Go Out Tonites" drops July 11th

Click it or stick it!

Right Click, save target as... or just left click and watch in the next page

Invalid video URL.

PS. Boo to not being able to embed video. Every other blog site lets you do it. This is why eLJay needs a great deal of improvement.

It was a hell of a party last night...

2006-06-30T00:03:45Z

well, it was actually last week, but whatev's.

So, I had the bday celebration at the labryinth last week and it was awesome. Thanks to everyone who showed up. What can I say about that the night? I had a lot of good friends show up, and I had a lot of martinis which were quite tasty. The line up for said martinis was, at times, ridiculous in its length, but that didn't stop me from getting wasted with my friends and having great conversations in the between. For some reason Ali would only buy me Labatt 50s, but it was alcohol and it was free, so I took it! Thanks to Steph, Leslie and whoever that other person was who bought me free drinks (I really can't remember for the life of me who else bought me drinks).

Well, after much conversations and drinks, everyone decided to go home, and I was still downtown with Newmarket not being any closer 'cause I'm drunk. But Trevor randomly showed up that night (apparently he heard 'bout the bday bash), so what happened was me, Trevor, and Steph and her friend Katherine (Ed. STEPH! YOU'RE SUCH A PARTY TROOPER!!), well we went to the boat, Trevor's bar and we did a little drunken Karaoke and free springrolls - not to mention another drink for me (It was a cranberry vodka if anyone wanted to know). We sang a bunch of shit; "Hey Jude","Piano Man","Everything I do (I do it for you)","Livin' on a Prayer" and the guys sung me Happy Bday which was sweet. Well, after spending a bit of time there, we walked over to Bathurst to make sure Steph and Katherine got onto the Blue line alright. first off, we hit up the McDs to grab late night munchies - which totally hit the spot. Then as we walked out, the bus showed so it was perfect timing! We said our goodbyes to Steph and Katherine and then me and Trevor headed to his loft.

First, I just gotta say about Trevor's loft: It's SEXY. This is perhaps the best and coolest apartment I have ever seen. The building was on Nassau & Spadina, and was a converted college or something. It was really nice, and clean - I'm dead serious I got wood seeing this loft. Anyways, I was enjoying my drunkeness and Trevor put on "There's Something About Mary" (at my request) and inflated one of those foam beds and eventually I passed out from all the great partying - another great bday in the books.

Next morning, I was paying the price for all the awesome - yes Choup threw up. Let this be a lesson to you kiddies; Being too awesome isn't for the faint of heart.

As I was leaving, I noticed a really cool run that Trevor had, and I'd like to share with all of you what it said:

"You can always re-take a class, but you can never re-live a party."

Truer words were never spoken.

Anyways, other things happening: I got that job at American Eagle and right now I'm getting squat hours. I hope that'll change soon but I still have the awesome discount.

Consolidation loan is hopefully on the way. If it gets approved, I can pay off those Credit Cards, and pay for the gym fees and get start learning Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu and Kickboxing.

That's all folks, hope things are good in your world.

PS. What's going on with Canada Day?

It's a Celebration bitches!

2006-06-15T04:58:13Z

Hey all, that time of year has come again; it's my BIRTHDAY!

So, in honour of this annual celebration of my birth, I'd like any and all of my friends who can make it to come down to the Labryinth on:

WEDNESDAY, JUNE 21st

The Labryinth is located at Bloor & Brunswick downtown. It is across from the Brunswick house, and just behind the bakery (the name escapes me). I'm gonna try to be there between 9:30 and 10pm. Just an FYI the place does fill up pretty quickly on a night like this so you might want to try to get there before 10pm as well.

As an extra added incentive, Wednesday at the Labryinth happens to be MARTINI night - so there will be tones of different martinis in all different flavours and concoctions - I've heard nothing but good things about their martinis so if you don't want to come for me 'cause you think I'm a dork, then you can come for the Martinis!

So yeah, it'd be awesome to see any of you there and I'd really appreciate having my friends help me ring in my 26th year of life.

RSVP... BBC... KFC...

One last thing, I don't think I have EVERYONE'S email so if you see someone i know and I haven't expressed any hatred for them, then the chances are I would love to see them there so spread the word, forward the email, do whatever you gotta to get the word out... I definitely don't have Home Free or Cash Money emails, so let them know!

I do think the place is 19+ as well...

Yo

2006-06-11T04:07:13Z

So, what's happened...

Wednesday was Giles' birthday and many were in attendance. It was a fun, chill night with good people abound, as well as lots of F-Zero and Back to the Future. Jess and Todd were there which was a suprise, I didn't know they were coming up, but it was good to see them since I haven't in forever because they currently don't have internet. The inevitable debate came in regard to Loose Change. Essentially it was me vs. Everyone else in terms of the authenticity and validity of that film - No one's opinion has changed for the better unfortunately, lol. Regardless, Everyone had a good time at Home Free and it was well worth it. I later crashed at Bexy's place and in the AM her cat made me allergic and I drove her to work. I now know definately that I am allergic to cats...

What else? My enrollment date has come and gone... and I haven't registered because I still have tuition to pay off for this year. It's gonna be terrible and a bitch to get it paid off but its gotta happen before I can register. I hope by the time I can register that the classes I need will still be there.

It looks like I'm close to having a job at American Eagle. The interview went well and right now they're just doing the reference check and I'll know in a couple of days if I have a job. I have a lot of experience which they acknowledge and I'm gonna try to work and get a lot of hours (it's totally dependent on how well you work and meeting goals). I'm gonna feel it out for a week and then if I need to, maybe look for a second job - Henry's in Newmarket is supposed to be hiring soonish, so I might go beat down their door for a while until they give me some consideration.

Finally - I've made the decision that I am definitely starting mixed martial arts (MMA). Warrior Martial Arts Centre is right here in Newmarket and is supposed to be pretty good, Carlos Newton is supposed to be involved with it in some way (former UFC Welterweight Champ). Along with this I'm looking to improve my overall fitness so I've been researching Circuit Resistance Training for Cardio and overall strength, as well as nutrition that will help me get in better shape. Here's to hoping it all works out.

That's about all in my life right now. Birthday is coming up soon, and Jess' bday is this coming Monday so I'm gonna get down there if I can - the Ab is also open for convocation so I'll be trying to get down there for that as well.

I gots soul...

2006-05-25T05:05:47Z

You Are a Dreaming Soul

Your vivid emotions and imagination takes you away from this world
So much so that you tend to live in your head most of the time
You have great dreams and ambitions that could be the envy of all...
But for you, following through with your dreams is a bit difficult

You are charming, endearing, and people tend to love you.
Forgiving and tolerant, you see the world through rose colored glasses.
Underneath it all, you have a ton of passion that you hide from others.
Always hopeful, you tend to expect positive outcomes in your life.

Souls you are most compatible with: Newborn Soul, Prophet Soul, and Traveler Soul

What Kind of Soul Are You?

DVD Review: Kingdom of Heaven DC

2006-05-25T02:30:11Z

On Tuesday, I blind bought the Director's Cut of Ridley Scott's latest Epic "Kingdom of Heaven." In theatres, it was met with mixed reviews, some enjoying it, some saying it was rushed and felt very 'empty.' The hour that was cut from the film was made widely known and many felt it was this extreme editing that caused the film to suffer.

Well, I never actually saw the film in theatres for this very reason; I'd heard that it wasn't that great and that the film had suffered from editing and eventually I heard about the DVD treatment that it would be getting.

Without getting too much into the plot of the film, I will give a general opinion of the film. To put it simply, I really enjoyed the Director's Cut of Kingdom of Heaven and am glad that I bought it. The film clocks in at 3hrs, 20mins and is an excellent human drama and character study set atop a very rich and violent history of the world. I enjoyed many of the relationships between the characters and their respective personalities and their motivations for actions within the movie - Balian's search for a purpose, King Baldwin's love for his Kingdom and Strength of character despite his illness, Guy's thirst for power, etc.

Of course, religion is at the center of this particular film, but I was really impressed with how they handled it - the film did not lean one way; painting Christians as evil or Muslims as evil. Rather, you see fanaticism on both sides, and you also see good conscience on both sides. The film implied that religion was not about who was right, but rather respecting fellow humans and that being holy is more about doing what is right and helping others; afterall, everyone believes in God.

The action is well paced and really does give the epic feel. It is fairly violent at parts, on par with Gladitor and Braveheart and there were a lot of be-headings in the film. The film isn't all action either, it is nicely spaced between the previously mentioned character study and interactions.

Well anyways, the Directors Cut is an excellent film, and I'm glad that I've watched this rather then the butchered theatrical cut.

So I was thinking...

2006-05-21T03:42:21Z

I just noticed there's like, four of us having Bdays in June. That's a lot of Bdays!

I was thinking it'd be way cool if we had an extra 'group bday celebration' for the peeps with a June date; so that would be Jon, Me, Jess & Leighann. I don't think it'd ever actually happen, but it'd still be pretty awesome if we could all get together and just do one big bash.

June is the big month, we should celebrate it in a big way! :p

Sidenote: anyone know what would be fun and that we could do my bday? I'm just thinking about going downtown to some bar... seems like the easiest thing to do afterall.

Do I make you horny baby? .... don't answer that.

2006-05-18T08:43:34Z

<td align="center"> imdahman --
[adjective]:

Tasting like strawberries

'How will you be defined in the sexual dictionary?' at QuizUniverse.com</td>

In other news, it's about a month away from my 26th(!) Birthday. Get ready Bitches!

Hey Todd! Here's an idea!

2006-05-11T00:21:05Z

I heard that you guys are getting kittens so congrats. Jess told me that it's a possibility of getting a boy and a girl, and that you'll be naming them if you get them.

Well, here's my idea - and by the way Jess LOVED the idea >:-) - you should name the kittens after Firefly characters!

Boy and a girl?

Mal and Kaylee?
Jayne and Kaylee?
River and Simon?
Wash and Zoe?

You KNOW you want to name them those names!!

So Choup, what did you do 2nite?

2006-05-10T02:21:39Z

I'm glad you asked! 2nite, I talked to Alda all the way in Spain via Skype and it was great. We talked about random stuff and how much she's enjoying Spain itself. We talked about roadtrips, missing people and random shit, as well as the stuff she's been upto while she's been over there. WE fantasized about potential roadtrips and all the experiences that can happen when friends are around.

Man, I miss that girl, but it was great talking to her 2nite.

Yeah... today was a good day.

Love ya Alda <3

Music musings...

2006-05-08T19:16:24Z

I recently discovered "Good Feeling" by the Violent Femmes, good song. I d/led a Greatest Hits album and listened to the rest - not so good. No wonder these guys never made it big, they got lucky on their first album with a few songs, then really died. So I'll be deleting the rest of the songs I have and holding onto "Good Feeling", "American Music", and "Blister in the Sun."

Butch Walker's new album is coming July 18th, entitled "Butch Walker and the rise and fall of the Lets Go Out Tonites." He'll be starting a tour in July and coming to the Mod Club again on the 31st of July and I will TOTALLY be in attendance again!

The tickets will probably be real cheap, and I'd like ppl to go with... but since I seem to be the only one who knows who he is, that probably won't happen, lol.

In other news...

2006-05-07T05:33:13Z

Uhh, I said I'd talk about last week and helping Jess & Todd move, so here goes!

Anyways, the drive down was hectic, like any other major city there was mad traffic that I had to deal with but I managed and got to 933 with relative ease.

So, we start loading stuff up and we bring the first load over to the treehouse.

Honestly, what can I say here? How much fun could a move be? Not at all, lol.

Anyways, the place is quite cool. When I was imagining it in my head, For some reason I kept thinking that it was really, really small, but a lot of those fears were dismissed when I finally saw the place. It was actually kinda roomy, and seemed perfect for the two of them. The rooftop patio was a bit cluttered but it'll look more spacious when its cleaned up and there is more aesthetic stuff hanging around.

Anyways, I also helped Todd get the sofa. We drive over and eventually find the place and I have to say that their apartment was NICE. They were only paying $1200 for the three of them in a very nice neighbourhood, and they had fixed it up nicely. The place really looked like a steal. They did say that the owner of the place was a bit of a bitch, and it seemed accurate based on the few minutes that we talked to her. We grabbed the couch and slid it down the fire escape - yes, we literally slid it down - and loaded the sucker into the back of my van and it fit fine! They also had this other couch that they were just getting rid of, and so we helped them carry it to a nearby dumpster. As Todd said, if I never carry another sofa, it'll be too soon - those damn things are heavy!

So, we pack up most of the rest of the stuff, and head over again to the new place, this time with Jess sitting in the back as well as Craig. We unload more stuff into the apartment and then work on getting the futon into the bedroom. First, Todd takes it apart and attempts to get it up the stairs. the first part goes alright, but the frame of it doesn't seem to want to go - at least not initially. After using a little brain juice (eww), I figure out that we can actually scouch the futon frame up and low and behold, the futon is now up in the bedroom!

Then we had to put it back together which also proved to be a titan feet. Todd couldn't get it, Jess couldn't get it... but I could. That's right I got it 'cause I'm awesome and an apparent handyman - that's not true as tools scare me; I think they are out to get me :|

Well, during all this, we did have beer, and that was refreshing. Eventually we get most of the moving down and in the apartment, then we go up onto the rooftop and chill - this was quite a good idea and I'm really glad they have this patio. It was great just sitting up there, chillin', drinking beers and jamming with Todd.

Eventually, I had to go home, so that was that. I was sore, but I got to see the new place and helped some friends move, so not a bad day - it was probably the most exercise I've gotten in a while :p

Memorable lines:

Todd: What should go on top?
Choup: I don't care what's on top
Jess: *snicker* hahahahahaaaaaaa

There was more, but I can't remember. It was a week ago! Other peepes that were present (Jess & Todd), help me out!

Hey Todd!!!

2006-05-07T04:47:26Z

First off, yes New American was a subjective choice. I kinda regret posting that to be honest, but what's done is done.

Okay... I will state first and foremost that you are committing many of the argumentative fallacies that you are using to debunk my research and that you imply I am doing. You are also ignoring much of the scientific process in order to strengthen your point. So, i'm going to go over some of your points.

First off; Psychological Campaign. Is there any substantial scientific evidence that something like this on a mass scale can be done? You'll probably send a journal my way about how this can be done and is being done by the government, probably by way of one of these organizations that believe the gov't orchestrated 9/11. Scientific Reserach always asks one to consdier the source - is it credible? What is their history? What have they done in the past? Peer reviewed?

Secondly, you completely ignored my sources and the fact that they describe, using the science and engineering theory to explain, why the towers came down. You said that they are flawed organizations and thus I shouldn't believe them. Well, where did your sources come from? How can I trust them? Do your sources offer alternative explanations and give you indepth engineering theory? Do you see a pattern here? We can disavow eachother's information until we're blue in the face.

I'm reminded of a problem that was pointed out in my science and pseudoscience class - the Green Monkey.

There is a green monkey causing havoc in my room, knocking things over. Prove me wrong.
Q. Can I see this monkey?
A. No, he's invisible
Q. I'll used heat radar to find him
A. Can't do that, he gives off no body heat
Q. I'll listen for this monkey noises
A. Can't do that, he's completely silent
Q. CAn i see the footprint indents on the carpet?
A. No, he hovers as he moves
Q. Can I get a fingerprint from things he knocks over?
A. No, he leaves no marks of any kind
Q. Can i set up surveillence for when an Item is knocked over?
A. No, he often possesses others to knock things over
Q. Can I wait until he possess a person and scan them?
A. No, its completely undetectable

the scientific method requires that any and all avenues are possible to explore. When you start cutting off all avenues or reserach, then the experiment becomes problematic.

You stated that they are constantly referring to the same group to prove their facts; what are your sources doing? Have they gone out and done the practical work and examined the sites? How many outside resources did they use to prove their stance? Did they jump to conclusions?

you tell me to be careful of the sources I use... Have you questioned your sources? Or do you take them at face value because they paint the picture that the Gov't is evil incarnate and orchestrated the death of 100s of thousands of people?

Are you a structural engineer? I am not, so all I can do is refer to the several articles that I posted in this regard. Here are some points

- the WTC were 95% air, hence why there wasn't THAT much debris
- The structure was weakened thanks to fires from the difuse flames
- As it was falling, it initally had 10+ floors, their weight, and the force of it coming down onto the next floor to contend with, also coming down onto a WEAKENED structure
- As it collapsed onto the next floor, you have 10+ floors, an extra floor, and now the motion and gravity of this added weight coming down onto subsequent floors.
- The steel did not melt as the fire wouldn't get anywhere near hot enough, but it was hot enough to COMPROMISE the structural integrity, coupled with a jet acting as molotov cocktail, the cumulative damage led to a collapse

The wings.

How fast was the plane going at the time? 700-800 feet a second I believe is roughly the speed. Anything going that fast is going to cause damage. Maybe the wings didn't sever the support columns, but again I reiterate that you don't need to sever the support columns, you have to compromise their structural integrity enough for them to collapse.

When you set something of fire, the length of the burn also attributes to how much it is weakened. You say that the fire couldnn't even get hot enough to weaken it; how long were those supports on fire? How conductive is the material? Once again cumulative and prolonged exposure to the fire weakened the steel enough to cause a collapse.

The Towers did not collapse immediately, the structures and supports were on fire for what? A few hours before the WTC came down? You might have to correct me on this particular aspect because i can't remember when they collapsed (time specific).

Did you look at all articles? How about that PDF of the engineering schematics of the WTC and the reason it fell?

We can debate this forever and ever and I don't think either of us would budge. Why do I believe the official reports that I've cited here? Because they are following the scientific method, and offer plausible explanations to the things that happened and they offer proof that could be recreated and reproduced. As I learned in my science and pseudoscience class, all these things are imperative to proper scientific process.

Why do I not believe many of the conspiracy theories? Because they jump to conclusions, have little to no proof, often using a LACK of proof to prove their point (a serious flaw in scientific research) nor are able to substantiate many of their claims with scientific or engineering theory. They use the argumentative fallacy of authority of one, lack of evidence, and hasty conclusions. As well as circumstantial evidence, even misreporting certain aspects of the event.

I'm channeling a lot of the science and pseudoscience, as well as my critical thinking class, but I always worry that I can't convey the knowledge as well as one can. I wish I still had the recordings of his lectures because then I'd ask you to listen to those because they are excellent.

Hey Steph! Do you have them?!? What was the class website?!? Steph took the same class as me and I'll bet you that she can back me up in this! :p

Anyways, I should state for the record that I love ya man! It's why I helped you move! :D

EDIT: And here's another link! It's the NIST reserach and subsequent suggestion regarding the WTC. They also offer videos and experiments on the reaction of fire on WTC models and such. Go ahead and check it... or don't. YOu can critize the organization but they do something very important: They offer experiments and research notes in regard to the event. You'll probably call into question the science of it, so I don't know what else I can do but present this information to you. You have freewill and you choose to look at it objectively, and ultimately accept or deny it :)

NIST research

When you drop a phonebook onto the ground, what does it sound like? a low thud. What causes that? Its the actual phonebook hitting the ground, as well as the air in that partcular area being compressed, and then pushed out. Same as when you pump a hand air pump for a ball. When you push down on the pump, you can hear the air being pushed out. A low thud does not automatically constitute an explosion; Occam's Razor.

For Jess and Todd.....

2006-05-06T05:51:53Z

This is an article debunking many of the conspiracy theories surrounding 9/11. It is an article done by Popular Mechanics, and they employed several researchers and engineers to debunk each conspiracy. They do accredit some of the misinformation as misreporting on the day, and other report errors, etc. Give it the once over and see the other side.

Its an excellent article and I encourage you to see it. Afterall, in any debate it is very important to see both sides of the coin as it helps you to better understand your own position.

As for my statement; perhaps I worded it too harshly? My main point was that when people see something like this, often catering to their own opinions and beliefs, its very easy to take this one source as pure fact. Scientific research implores any and all research to get as much information as possible and draw conclusions based on all the facts.

So what am I doing? I'm giving you the otherside, enjoy :)

Popular Mechanics Article

EDIT: Here's another article I found in regard to why the WTC collapsed, using diagrams, pictures and engineering theory to show why the towers collapsed. I'll probably add articles as I find them Why the WTC collapsed

WTC Steel stresses - Essentially written in the language of physics and engineering, lots of graphs and formulas for why the steel of the WTC gave out (bolts failing, as well as stress on the steel). tough read 'cause of all the scientific formulas and such - but still quite valid in this context.

More Articles debunking 9/11 conspiracies - Links to several articles debunking the 9/11 conspiracies

More articles debunking conspiracy theories around 9/11 - Concentrated specifically on a British MP who was stating many of these conspiracies.

The New American - Another article

Beverly yell at Beachwood on the terms of 'selling out'

2006-05-05T00:11:05Z

I found this article at a forum and I think it's an interesting editorial - it has to do mainly with the notion of 'selling out,' but it can be taken in a broader context and how to just do your own thing, stay true to yourself and ignore other people who accuse you and are overly-critical of your actions.

------

this is written by David Eggars. he is amazing. so ask yourself one question? which one are you? laugh when they cry, jump when their down, smile when they frown.... we're all going down.....

You actually asked me the question: "Are you taking any steps to keep shit real?" I want you always to look back on this time as being a time when those words came out of your mouth.

Now, there was a time when such a question - albeit probably without the colloquial spin - would have originated from my own brain. Since I was thirteen, sitting in my orange-carpeted bedroom in ostensibly cutting-edge Lake Forest, Illinois, subscribing to the Village Voice and reading the earliest issues of Spin, I thought I had my ear to the railroad tracks of avant garde America. (Laurie Anderson, for example, had grown up only miles away!) I was always monitoring, with the most sensitive and well-calibrated apparatus, the degree of selloutitude exemplified by any given artist - musical, visual, theatrical, whatever. I was vigilant and merciless and knew it was my job to be so.

I bought R.E.M.'s first EP, Chronic Town, when it came out and thought I had found God. I loved Murmur, Reckoning, but then watched, with greater and greater dismay, as this obscure little band's audience grew, grew beyond obsessed people like myself, grew to encompass casual fans, people who had heard a song on the radio and picked up Green and listened for the hits. Old people liked them, and stupid people, and my moron neighbor who had sex with truck drivers. I wanted these phony R.E.M.-lovers dead.

But it was the band's fault, too. They played on Letterman. They switched record labels. Even their album covers seemed progressively more commercial. And when everyone I knew began liking them, I stopped. Had they changed, had their commitment to making art with integrity changed? I didn't care, because for me, any sort of popularity had an inverse relationship with what you term the keeping 'real' of 'shit.' When the Smiths became slightly popular they were sellouts. Bob Dylan appeared on MTV and of course was a sellout. Recently, just at dinner tonight, after a huge, sold-out reading by David Sedaris and Sarah Vowell (both sellouts), I was sitting next to an acquaintance, a very smart acquaintance married to the singer-songwriter of a very well-known band. I mentioned that I had seen the Flaming Lips the night before. She rolled her eyes. "Oh I really liked them on 90210," she sneered, assuming that this would put me and the band in our respective places.

However.

Was she aware that The Flaming Lips had composed an album requiring the simultaneous playing of four separate discs, on four separate CD players? Was she aware that the band had once, for a show at Lincoln Center, handed out to audience members something like 100 portable tape players, with 100 different tapes, and had them all played at the same time, creating a symphonic sort of effect, one which completely devastated everyone in attendance? I went on and on to her about the band's accomplishments, their experiments. Was she convinced that they were more than their one appearance with Jason Priestly? She was.

Now, at that concert the night before, Wayne Coyne, the lead singer, had himself addressed this issue, and to great effect. After playing much of their new album, the band paused and he spoke to the audience. I will paraphrase what he said:

"Hi. Well, some people get all bitter when some song of theirs gets popular, and they refuse to play it. But we're not like that. We're happy that people like this song. So here it goes."

Then they played the song. (You know the song.) "She Don't Use Jelly" is the song, and it is a silly song, and it was their most popular song. But to highlight their enthusiasm for playing the song, the band released, from the stage and from the balconies, about 200 balloons. (Some of the balloons, it should be noted, were released by two grown men in bunny suits.) Then while playing the song, Wayne sang with a puppet on his hand, who also sang into the microphone. It was fun. It was good.

But was it a sellout? Probably. By some standards, yes. Can a good band play their hit song? Should we hate them for this? Probably, probably. First 90210, now they go playing the song every stupid night. Everyone knows that 90210 is not cutting edge, and that a cutting edge alternarock band should not appear on such a show. That rule is clearly stated in the obligatory engrained computer-chip sellout manual that we were all given when we hit adolescence.

But this sellout manual serves only the lazy and small. Those who bestow sellouthood upon their former heroes are driven to do so by, first and foremost, the unshakable need to reduce. The average one of us - a taker-in of various and constant media, is absolutely overwhelmed - as he or she should be - with the sheer volume of artistic output in every conceivable medium given to the world every day - it is simply too much to begin to process or comprehend - and so we are forced to try to sort, to reduce. We designate, we label, we diminish, we create hierarchies and categories.

Through largely received wisdom, we rule out Tom Waits's new album because it's the same old same old, and we save $15. U2 has lost it, Radiohead is too popular. Country music is bad, Puff Daddy is bad, the last Wallace book was bad because that one reviewer said so. We decide that TV is bad unless it's the Sopranos. We liked Rick Moody and Jonathan Lethem and Jeffrey Eugenides until they allowed their books to become movies. And on and on. The point is that we do this and to a certain extent we must do this. We must create categories, and to an extent, hierarchies.

But you know what is easiest of all? When we dismiss.

Oh how gloriously comforting, to be able to write someone off. Thus, in the overcrowded pantheon of alternarock bands, at a certain juncture, it became necessary for a certain brand of person to write off The Flaming Lips, despite the fact that everyone knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that their music was superb and groundbreaking and real. We could write them off because they shared a few minutes with Jason Priestley and that terrifying Tori Spelling person. Or we could write them off because too many magazines have talked about them. Or because it looked like the bassist was wearing too much gel in his hair.

One less thing to think about. Now, how to kill off the rest of our heroes, to better make room for new ones?

We liked Guided by Voices until they let Ric Ocasek produce their latest album, and everyone knows Ocasek is a sellout, having written those mushy Cars songs in the late 80s, and then - gasp! - produced Weezer's album, and of course Weezer's no good, because that Sweater song was on the radio, right, and dorky teenage girls were singing it and we cannot have that and so Weezer is bad and Ocasek is bad and Guided by Voices are bad, even if Spike Jonze did direct that one Weezer video, and we like Spike Jonze, don't we?

Oh. No. We don't. We don't like him anymore because he's married to Sofia Coppola, and she is not cool. Not cool. So bad in Godfather 3, such nepotism. So let's check off Spike Jonze - leaving room in our brains for who??

It's exhausting.

The only thing worse than this sort of activity is when people, students and teachers alike, run around college campuses calling each other racists and anti-Semites. It's born of boredom, lassitude. Too cowardly to address problems of substance where such problems actually are, we claw at those close to us. We point to our neighbor, in the khakis and sweater, and cry foul. It's ridiculous. We find enemies among our peers because we know them better, and their proximity and familiarity means we don't have to get off the couch to dismantle them.

And now, I am also a sellout. Here are my sins, many of which you may know about already:
First, I was a sellout because Might magazine took ads.Then I was a sellout because our pages were color, and not stapled together at the Kinko's.Then I was a sellout because I went to work for Esquire.Now I'm a sellout because my book has sold many copies.And because I have done many interviews.And because I have let people take my picture.And because my goddamn picture has been in just about every fucking magazine and newspaper printed in America.

And now, as far as McSweeney's is concerned, The Advocate interviewer wants to know if we're losing also our edge, if the magazine is selling out, hitting the mainstream, if we're still committed to publishing unknowns, and pieces killed by other magazines.

And the fact is, I don't give a fuck. When we did the last issue, this was my thought process: I saw a box. So I decided we'd do a box. We were given stories by some of our favorite writers - George Saunders, Rick Moody (who is uncool, uncool!), Haruki Murakami, Lydia Davis, others - and so we published them. Did I wonder if people would think we were selling out, that we were not fulfilling the mission they had assumed we had committed ourselves to?

No. I did not. Nor will I ever. We just don't care. We care about doing what we want to do creatively. We want to be interested in it. We want it to challenge us. We want it to be difficult. We want to reinvent the stupid thing every time. Would I ever think, before I did something, of how those with sellout monitors would respond to this or that move? I would not. The second I sense a thought like that trickling into my brain, I will put my head under the tires of a bus.

You want to know how big a sellout I am?

A few months ago I wrote an article for Time magazine and was paid $12,000 for it I am about to write something, 1,000 words, 3 pages or so, for something called Forbes ASAP, and for that I will be paid $6,000 For two years, until five months ago, I was on the payroll of ESPN magazine, as a consultant and sometime contributor. I was paid handsomely for doing very little. Same with my stint at Esquire. One year I spent there, with little to no duties. I wore khakis every day. Another Might editor and I, for almost a year, contributed to Details magazine, under pseudonyms, and were paid $2000 each for what never amounted to more than 10 minutes work - honestly never more than that. People from Hollywood want to make my book into a movie, and I am probably going to let them do so, and they will likely pay me a great deal of money for the privilege.

Do I care about this money? I do. Will I keep this money? Very little of it. Within the year I will have given away almost a million dollars to about 100 charities and individuals, benefiting everything from hospice care to an artist who makes sculptures from Burger King bags. And the rest will be going into publishing books through McSweeney's. Would I have been able to publish McSweeney's if I had not worked at Esquire? Probably not. Where is the $6000 from Forbes going? To a guy named Joe Polevy, who wants to write a book about the effects of radiator noise on children in New England.

Now, what if I were keeping all the money? What if I were buying property in St. Kitt's or blew it all on live-in prostitutes? What if, for example, I was, a few nights ago, sitting at a table in SoHo with a bunch of Hollywood slash celebrity acquaintances, one of whom I went to high school with, and one of whom was Puff Daddy? Would that make me a sellout? Would that mean I was a force of evil?

What if a few nights before that I was at the home of Julian Schnabel, at a party featuring Al Pacino and Robert DeNiro, and at which Schnabel said we should get together to talk about him possibly directing my movie? And what if I said sure, let's?

Would all that make me a sellout? Would I be uncool? Would it have been more cool to not go to this party, or to not have written that book, or done that interview, or to have refused millions from Hollywood?

The thing is, I really like saying yes. I like new things, projects, plans, getting people together and doing something, trying something, even when it's corny or stupid. I am not good at saying no. And I do not get along with people who say no. When you die, and it really could be this afternoon, under the same bus wheels I'll stick my head if need be, you will not be happy about having said no. You will be kicking your ass about all the no's you've said. No to that opportunity, or no to that trip to Nova Scotia or no to that night out, or no to that project or no to that person who wants to be naked with you but you worry about what your friends will say.

No is for wimps. No is for pussies. No is to live small and embittered, cherishing the opportunities you missed because they might have sent the wrong message.

There is a point in one's life when one cares about selling out and not selling out. One worries whether or not wearing a certain shirt means that they are behind the curve or ahead of it, or that having certain music in one's collection means that they are impressive, or unimpressive.

Thankfully, for some, this all passes. I am here to tell you that I have, a few years ago, found my way out of that thicket of comparison and relentless suspicion and judgment. And it is a nice feeling. Because, in the end, no one will ever give a shit who has kept shit 'real' except the two or three people, sitting in their apartments, bitter and self-devouring, who take it upon themselves to wonder about such things. The keeping real of shit matters to some people, but it does not matter to me. It's fashion, and I don't like fashion, because fashion does not matter.

What matters is that you do good work. What matters is that you produce things that are true and will stand. What matters is that the Flaming Lips's new album is ravishing and I've listened to it a thousand times already, sometimes for days on end, and it enriches me and makes me want to save people. What matters is that it will stand forever, long after any narrow-hearted curmudgeons have forgotten their appearance on goddamn 90210. What matters is not the perception, nor the fashion, not who's up and who's down, but what someone has done and if they meant it. What matters is that you want to see and make and do, on as grand a scale as you want, regardless of what the tiny voices of tiny people say. Do not be critics, you people, I beg you. I was a critic and I wish I could take it all back because it came from a smelly and ignorant place in me, and spoke with a voice that was all rage and envy. Do not dismiss a book until you have written one, and do not dismiss a movie until you have made one, and do not dismiss a person until you have met them. It is a fuckload of work to be open-minded and generous and understanding and forgiving and accepting, but Christ, that is what matters. What matters is saying yes.

I say yes, and Wayne Coyne says yes, and if that makes us the enemy, then good, good, good. We are evil people because we want to live and do things. We are on the wrong side because we should be home, calculating which move would be the least damaging to our downtown reputations. But I say yes because I am curious. I want to see things. I say yes when my high school friend tells me to come out because he's hanging with Puffy. A real story, that. I say yes when Hollywood says they'll give me enough money to publish a hundred different books, or send twenty kids through college. Saying no is so fucking boring.
And if anyone wants to hurt me for that, or dismiss me for that, for saying yes, I say Oh do it, do it you motherfuckers, finally, finally, finally.

----------

Hope you were able to get through it all, its an intriguing editorial. I'll be posting about recent events in the next day or so (specifically, helping Jess & Todd move).

Late night bullet points

2006-04-26T03:36:09Z

It's late, i'm watching TV and here's some other stuff going on.

- I'm helping Todd and the J-Ro move this Sunday. They asked, they're friends so I'm lending the van and moving powers. It'll also give me a chance to check out this suave new crib, as well as the ROOF PATIO. Good times, oh yeah.

- I've decided that I want to take up martial arts, specificially Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu (essentially ground grappling). Why? Because I've always wanted to learn martial arts, but never found the time, and because I'd like to get in shape and I figure doing something I'd enjoy and something that would teach me to defend myself as opposed to just doing repetitious weights would keep my interest better. This probably won't happen anytime soon, hell, it might not happen until after school and when I have an actual job and more money. I found a potentially good school that's on Bloor & Christie, and there are others semi-closer, but I'd need the money and ability to commit which are things I don't have right now. When I'm done school is probably when things will kick in motion..... unless York teaches Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, but I'm pretty sure they don't.

- Job hunt goes cold at the moment. No jobs or calls for interviews yet. Still no word from York either so I think I won't be getting a job at York this summer. I'm hoping I can find a job around here for the summer.

- My Birthday looms... 2 months away in fact. Argh! I'll be 26! Dang yo, where does the time go?

Not much else in the way of ramblings, so we'll end it here.

Update from beyond...

2006-04-21T04:12:19Z

Okay, been a while since I updated. It looks like I'm starting to get out of the habit of updating which isn't that cool. I guess my affection changes like the currents of the wind... whoa, that was almost not cheesy.

Anyways, school: It's done. I've completely my 4th year at YorkU, and I'll be victory lapping it next year with a mere 21 credits. I'm still debating what classes to take, but I definitely want to take a lighting studio, and I think I want to do a Jazz guitar. I still have one art history to do, and for the last thing, i need a studio, so I'm thinking another photography, but not the advanced exploration - maybe black and white? Or maybe I need a break from photography and I need to get back in touch with my drawing skills. I used to love drawing but its literally been forever since I've done any serious drawing and that needs to change.

Exams were fairly painless because i didn't have a lot to do. I had a take-home exam, portfolio and guitar jury which equaled zero stress. I stuck around for a while at York, using up credit cards and what not and then finally moved home a couple days ago.

Speaking of money and jobs - dang yo, I'm in some trouble. I have literally zero cash around. My credit cards are all maxed, and my bank account is currently in the minus. I don't know where I'm going to get cash to pay for these monthly bills. I also still don't have a job but I have been sending out resumes and looking. It's going badly. There's a workshop on Saturday that I'll hopefully be going to for York Grounds crew. I need a job, hopefully this is it.

Being back home is not fun. I've never really stated this out loud but things are on the bad side between me and my mom (I guess my dad too, but he isn't around, he's in Thailand setting up a company). We fight regularily, or more like she spouts off what's wrong with me and I give her attitude and ignore her. There have been a couple of times where it just came to a head and we argued. Recently that happened and it wasn't fun. What's worse is that I don't feel bad about it, I state that she's being - to put it simply - really mean and unkind and it's true. You don't talk to people the way she talks to me.

To be honest? If I could I wouldn't be here. I'd love to be downtown with my friends who actually show me a little respect rather than belittling me at every oppourtunity and pointing out all my faults. But what choice do I have? I have no money, and no job prospects right now. I will say this though, when I do get a job and I can actually support myself. I'm getting out of here and I'm going to have as little contact with her as possible.

The sad part of this is my brother and sisters. I love them very much and love being around them. They are growing up before my eyes and I'm really enjoying seeing that. I'd love to be around constantly and talk and guide them, but things are just so unbareable between my mother and me. I hope they fair better. They have eachother which is great and something I didn't have. I've essentially been an only child; they have one another to talk to and grow up with - they are eachother's support group.

Other Random notes:
- Chris Bosh has verbally committed to a 6 year extension; hoorah for Raps fans (namely me)!!
- I'm really into the UFC now. I watch the Ultimate Fighter and watch matches whenever possible. Great sport
- Not going to lie, crushin' on someone i met recently. Not saying who 'cause... well, I never do and it probably won't go anywhere even if I find a way to ask her out.
- No money... did I mention that?
- Missing my friends already, especially that one all the way over in Spain who had the superpower of making me feel better from 1000miles away after a big fight with my mom.
- Summer, summer... hopefully it'll be a good one! I'd say that I plan to get in shape, but everyone knows that isn't going to happen

Alrighty, I think I'm done here. Peace and love folks

CashMoney! and other randoms

2006-04-09T23:20:05Z

So, Friday night was a GOOD night. It was CashMoney and it meant an awesome house party hosted by Nick, Julian, Jamie, Alex and Jordan - I'd heard rumors as to how kickass it was, but nothing could prepare me for the evenutal LEGENDARY event that was CashMoney #3.

I walked over to Pond with Lee Ann, and met up with some other ppl that were all walking over in a big group - it was the smart idea since it was dark and the neigbourhood has a rep. It was mostly ppl I knew, but didn't really hang out with - Acquaintences if you will. So we walked over around 10ish and eventually got to the place around 10:30 I think? I stepped in and the house was half-full. So the party was ramping up, but still not 100% I start the drinking and socializing and everything is going well.

More time passes, a LOT more people show up and all of a sudden the place is PACKED. I mean PACKED! As in you had no elbow room and couldn't move without bumping into someone. The good thing however was that everyone was really friendly, knew someone and everyone was really respectful of the space and the fact that an awesome party was happening. I did hear of some trouble with a random though. Apparently he just showed up and he tried to steal the beer bong and subsequently nearly got beat down by hosts and concerned party patrons. I don't even know how he found out about the party - he probably was just walking along and saw a party happening and stepped in. He got dealt with though which is good. I probably would've went all mental on him if I was there (I remind people of the football incident of last year...).

Well, for a good part of the night I was just floating around talking to people i knew as well as meeting new people. A couple of people worth mentioning would be Monica and Tanya. Monica is a friend of Ronald and they'll be roommates next year. She was cool, and we had some good conversations - also with Ronald there, he's a good guy and I definitely don't talk to him enough which is a shame. Tanya is a dancer over at Ryerson and I ended up talking to her for most of the night. Once again we had some cool conversations and just ended up hanging out for most of the nice. I'm not gonna lie, she was cute and I developed some interest. But whatever, it was a party, we were chillin' and having fun. At the end of the night we said we'd keep in touch so she gave me her msn.

I finally left the party crazy-late (like 4am) and alone which kinda sucked. The walk was long and REALLY cold. I tried to hit up the McDs across the street, but the fucking attendant was being anal and wouldn't let me order 'cause I wasn't in a car - bitch! I got home relatively safely and just crashed. It was a good party for sure!

-----

I went home yesterday to take advantage of free food and because I haven't been home in a while. I managed to have yet another argument with my mom which sucked. I hate when it happens and I wish it wasn't the case. However, it manages to happen everytime I go home which is probably one of the reasons I don't like going home and continue to stay away for as long as humanly possible.

On the plus, I got a postcard from Alda in Spain which was great. I read it after the fight and it really cheered me up. It made me forget about the troubles at home for a moment. Even though she's a world away, she still manages to be a good friend and make me feel better about myself. Thanks babe, I love you.

I'm outta residence next week most likely and moving back home. I'm still looking for a job, but did send out a bunch of resumes on friday. Oh, I also got my portfolio mark back for photography and managed to get a 26/30 which is great. I'm happy.... and I just got a notice that i got an email from memory and place.

The situation there is that we got a brutal mark and I contested it, going over some points and such. She marked insanely harshly and rather unfairly IMO. Lets see what she said.....

And ultimately she bumped up our mark to 18/30. Looks like it payed off to some degree. She also went into detail about the marking scheme. She said that attendance and stuff was unusually high and that it was throwing off the grade curve so she had to mark the presentations accordingly. I'm just hoping the final mark is decent.

That's all for now. Back in residence and watching TV and hopefully some studying will happen.

Formal recap!

2006-04-05T21:26:15Z

Okay, its been a while since I've made an entry, and formal was last night so I thought it definitely warranted an entry.

Nothing much happened before formal (at least for me), got my wristband and saw everyone all dressed up so we'll start the story from getting to the hall. First off, it was a GORGEOUS hall and looked fantastic. It was definitely an excellent choice for formal. They had these two big screens that were playing videos and that was cool. At first they played this anime video... I don't know if it was an actual movie or not, but it was kinda cool and seemed to fit really well. There were also these coloured lights that were shining on the tables and that was way cool. The dance floor was this strip down the middle of the banquet hall and at the very end is where the band and DJ set up. Finally, the bar was on the opposite end of the DJ/Band and of course was fully stocked - no cutting us off or running out of booze 2nite!

Well, i got there on the first bus, checked my coat, walked up into the hall and found my seat (i was sitting with JP, Jason, Deanna and subsequent GFs), the bar wasn't open yet so I had to chill before it opened up. Soonafter other ppl that I knew arrived, namedly Todd and Jessica so for the most part I was hanging with them. Then the bar opened and good times began! Ben was busy on his gin and tonics and I got hooked on cranberry vodkas - an excellent drink BTW. Initially I was only getting one drink at a time but then J-Ro and Todd let me in on a little secret: It's WAY more efficent if you get two drinks at a time :D Well... drink after drink was had, and more great conversations ensued; I can't remember them all but they were fun, drunken conversations mingled in with J-Ro & Todd being all cute and such.

Soon after - and several drinks in - I see that Ryan and Anne arrived! It was great 'cause I don't see those guys enough and it was great to know that they'd be around all night and that we could catch up. So more great company abounds, more drinks and a lot of fun is being had. Of course more familiar faces show up and the place is really filling up and the lines are getting longer for the bar - see why getting two drinks was such a great idea! Finally, Steph showed up and I gave her a big hug because she was one of the main people to get this thing up and running and they she put a lot of effort into it and it really showed and ultimately Formal turned out really, really well. She deserved a lot of credit so giving her a big hug and thanking her was the least I could do. GREAT JOB STEPH!!

So... about 10 Cran/Vodkas in they start to serve dinner and the entree's which meant that the bar was cut off for a while. However, this wasn't all bad. As I sat down i noticed that the video changed on the screen. It was the Frosh Week Video for 2005! So it recapped several hilights from the week, and interspersed between these clips was good ol' Todd and Bear singing and being themselves - very witty and hilariously entertaining :) Dinner was pretty good, the salad wasn't great; then the pasta came which was pasta; and finally the chicken was quite good and I did finish off the plate. After dinner was done more drinking and dancing!

I should make a note that the band that played was great. Natasha and Bexy were front and centre and doing their thing. They provided some great music initially before the DJ came on. The music from the DJ sounded a little generic - a list of safe tunes that people could dance to, littered with a couple of requests. Overall, the music was fine and ultimately people didn't care that much 'cause everyone was drunk!

Well, at this point I'd had several more drinks and was absolutely hammered but still having a great time. I should note at this point me and Ryan were on the dance floor and he looks me straight in the eye and says "Tom, lets get you a girl." LOL... no easy task for sure, but if anyone could pull it off it would be Mr. Ryan Thomas. So we approach two gals - me wearing Ryan's Fidora - and begin dancing. Don't worry Anne, Ryan behaved himself ie no close dancing or grinding... that was me :p The girl I ended up dancing with was pretty cute. I tried to get her name but I couldn't fucking hear a word of what she was saying so we danced for a while and then went our seperate ways - no biggie, it was fun while it lasted. Anyways, I contined dancing around with friends and whatnot and just simply continued to have a great time.

A few more drinks, more dancing and regular visits to downstairs washroom littered the night. At one point, I went to the washroom, washed my face and then came out and wiped my face on Bear's bathrobe... I'm not really sure why I did that... but I think it might have been REALLY drunk at this point. Bear found it hilarious and eccentric, he said he felt like Jesus 'cause I did that, lol.

Of course, what would formal be without tons of ppl making out? Of course this was happening all around me and it comes with dancing and drinking, lol. Nothing much to report on my end and I'm not going to talk about anyone else. If they want to mention it that is their decision but its not my place nor polite or cool to talk about other people like that. Hey, for the most part people were just there to have a great time and everyone was having a great time and thats the important thing.

Dancing, dancing, pictures, conversations with great people continue, but eventually it all had to end and soonafter things closed up and everyone migrated downstairs to get their coats and wait for the bus or take cabs. Everyone (including myself) had the look; the 'I've been drinking a lot and now I'm coming down' look - the signs of a great night.

So, I say my goodbyes to the good people and more casual conversations ensue outside while waiting for the bus and eventually the bus came, I got on and it drove me home. Soonafter I'm in bed and sleep off a really great night.

Another great formal in the books. It had everything you would ever need; booze, great friends, dancing and an absolutely great vibe. I'm sure everyone else out there has other interesting stories to tell because there never is a shortage. I'm just not the one to tell them 'cause I'm boring and they didn't happen to me (nothing too exciting usually does happen to me).

Wow, what a great night. Great job to everyone involved in making it happen.

Post St. Patty's day recap!

2006-03-18T18:51:30Z

Okay, so first off, I sleep my ass in and get up at the crack of 2:30pm. I'm nice and refreshed and head to the Ab... for food. I was REALLY hungry so i picked up a Drunk Chicken Quesadilla and Shepherd's Pie, mmm good. So, I sit down with Scriver & Neal and we have some nice conversations and eventually Scriver leaves for work and me and Neal contine on talking about other stuff. Eventually Neil has to leave and so I got sit with a bunch of other people.

So, there I am sitting with Mohr, Drew and Aidan - there are other people there, but they were having their own conversations. Of course, more and more great conversations come out - the state of scifi, best Star Trek (DS9 natch!), and how awesome BSG is - most case facts coming from me. I should also note they reminisced a little bit; specifically about a LEGENDARY St. Patty's from '03 where they got so drunk that Drew and James stripped down into their boxers and did snow angels, lol! Man, I wish I had been there! The hours pass and more drinks are had and the whole time the Ab is quite full; I mean there had been a lineup since the early evening!

So eventually, Mohr and Drew are set to head downtown 'cause they have plans there. Initally I wasn't thinking about going until Mohr says; "Choup, you should come.... Come to Cleveland Choup." Well, when he put it like that, how could I say no? On the way out, we find Anne, and so we convince her to come along! Porn Rob is called, and he was already driving up here, so he picks us up and we head downtown - so much better then the TTC.

More and more conversations follow, and many top 5 lists were revealed, and soon enough we were on Bathurst St. along the Annex. Anne departs briefly to stow her bag at home, then the rest of us head to a nearby bar to have a couple pitchers. So me, Porn Rob, Danielle, Drew, Mohr, myself and eventually Anne sit down to a few drinks and i myself had a burger which was pretty good.

At about 10pm, me, Mohr and drew go our seperate ways because Mohr has a friend in a band and the band is playing a gig at a hotel. So we hop another cab and head over. Again, more drinks were had, a shot of tequila and I was DRUNK. So we get up near the raised stage and start listening to some good music. First up was a band named Linus and they were decent enough. After they played a few songs, Marla Zinger - the one with Mohr's friend - came on stage and they were great! Justin is the drummer who is Mohr's buddy and he was a GREAT drummer! Very solid and doing a lot of cool drum shit. Overall, I liked the band even if they weren't perfectly mixed, as Mohr pointed out.

Eventually, Drew had to go 'cause he was CRUNKED. Me and Mohr stayed around and near the end of Marla Zinger's set we also left 'cause we were both pretty messed up. We got in another cab and made the trek back home. We get there safe and sound... and by a somewhat strange route by the cabbie.....

I get home alright and head up to residence and run into some peeps i now waiting around for pizza. I dind't really feel like sleeping yet so I join them in their room and - wouldn't you know it - there's a guitar laying around so I start playing a bit. I just jammed for a while, played songs that people knew and didn't know and for the most part it was a nice chill couple of hours. Eventually, Steve got tired and it was crazy late so myself, Jess & Britney all left, but not before Steve was nice enough to give me a couple slices of Pizza - you're awesome dude! One flight of stairs later and I'm in my room

But I didn't sleep yet! I stayed up doing a couple things - well, mostly just watching TV and eventually Angel came on and naturally a great episode was showing from season5, "A hole in the world." is a great ep and it just proves how great a show Angel was and that it should NOT have been cancelled and kept on going. Anyways, it finished with the tragic death of Fred and rebirth as Illyria and i finally get to bed.

A really fun St. Patty's day and one worth remembering ;)

The only downside? At the end of the night me and Mohr were too drunk to go for late-night Chinese food :p

Essay done, what up!

2006-03-16T23:27:52Z

Okay, finished that big history paper this morning after staying up all night. It clocks in at a hefty 15 pages and 4, 836 words - booyah! I just wrote it out, trying to tackle all the issues that I thought were relevant and make sure i had some decent scene analysis, then I spent a few hours rewording things here and there and re-organizing it into a coherent structure.

Overall, I think its decent and I hope I get a decent mark. I've probably said this earlier, but I do enjoy the class and the material thats covered is really interesting. I'd recommend to anyone else out there looking for an elective to give it a shot, I think you'd enjoy it.

Now other stuff must happen so hopefully I can get on top of all of that. I'm so single minded most of the time, I have a hard time multitasking, but I can do it when I absolutely need to. Now I've got anothe essay to worry about, as well as my photography assignment.

I was stuck for a while, but finally came up with a cool idea. I'll need to shoot more, but the project isn't being critiqued for a couple of weeks so I've got some time. After that the portfolio will be due and I'll have to get on that. Right now, i'm leaning towards doing a website, but we'll see - i might just got the CD route.

Anyways, not much else going on, the usual shit - no money, out of food and general end of year stress and moods. On the plus side it's St. Paddy's day(ish) so I'll be blowing lots of money on getting my drunk on!

Busy weekend.....

2006-03-11T00:34:49Z

So, I have a major essay due on Wednesday which will consist of comparing two films - "Elizabeth" and "Room with a View" - and analyzing how they are both heritage films and specifically how Elizabeth is an alternative heritage film; like a costume drama. Right now I'm ripping the movies so that I can watch it as often as I need to and return the films back to SMIL tomorrow. Hopefully I won't slack off too much and get it done or at least space out work evenly over the next few days (the paper is due Wednesday).

Corsett pub night happened last night and it was another fun night. People got dressed up and good times were had by all. Soon it'll be St. Paddy's day and that's always a blast. For some reason I just got really tired at the end of the night, I don't know why maybe it's just the time of year but it happened and I checked out soon after 1ish and went to bed.

Another year is almost over and I'll probably start reflecting in a while - I will say I'm finding it harder and harder to talk about... nothing much seems to happen to me, I have a rather unremarkable perspective. Or maybe it's just that I always focus on the stuff that's not happening and the things that don't go well and my own inadequacies... that seems to be my M.O. You'd think I would have asserted myself at 25 and still not be worrying about being an outsider, feeling as though I don't have any REAL CLOSE friends, being single for another year with absolutely no one showing interest, doing rather poorly academically, and oh yeah, the fight pile with my parents continues to build.

Changing gears, I must not be getting emails from council anymore - I had no idea Steph had sent out an email about Acoustic Nite this Monday. I wanted to play the last one, but I never got any info about it. Wierd.....